Cultivate Confidence: How to Defeat Your Secret Insecurity

Insecurities are natural — everybody has at least one they don’t want you to know about. Even if you ooze confidence on the outside, you probably have moments when you doubt or criticize yourself internally. Left unchecked, insecurities can spiral into overall negativity about yourself.

The good news is that you don’t have to live weighed down by your insecurities. Here are some tip to help “defeat” them and feel your best every day.

Check Your Mindset

A positive mindset fosters confidence and security. Let’s look at some strategies for cultivating a positive mindset about yourself.

Be careful with comparisons 

It’s natural to sometimes compare ourselves to others. Some comparisons may even be positive and motivating. Unfortunately, however, many times they feed our insecurities and make us feel less worthy than other people — when in reality, we’re just different. There will always be people who are fitter, make more money, and appear happier, and others who are less fit, make less money, and — you get the idea. Comparison can create a cycle of using other people to determine our own worth.

Next time you compare yourself negatively with others, take a deep breath and redirect your thoughts.

You are worthy just as you are.

Feel your feelings, but challenge your thoughts

Ignoring insecurities won’t make them go away, and we can’t simply decide not to feel a certain way. So it’s okay to acknowledge insecure feelings and even name them. However, don’t stop there. Challenge unkind or untrue thoughts behind the feelings so you can eventually feel better.

Here are some tips for challenging and replacing negative thoughts:

  • Make a list of accomplishments you’re proud of.
  • Name things you like about your appearance.
  • Ask yourself: what good things do I bring into the world with my words, my actions, my relationships, my creativity?
  • Reframe specific negative thoughts. For example, My body is wrecked after having a baby! could be reframed as My body did an amazing thing, growing a baby! It will take time to find my new normal.
  • Think and speak to yourself as you would a close friend. If something would be unkind to say to someone you care about, it’s probably not appropriate to say it to yourself.
Take Care of Yourself

Don’t underestimate the power of simple self-care to help boost your confidence.

While “self-care” may be a buzzword, it’s also an important practice — and yet often neglected by busy adults. And it’s difficult to be confident if your core needs aren’t consistently met.

So, do a self-check:

  • Are you eating regularly?
  • Are you getting enough sleep to feel rested?
  • Do you have people in your life who love and support you?
  • Do you make time for exercise?
  • When you take time to meet your own needs, you show yourself and others that you believe in your worth.
Cultivate Joy

Boost your confidence by making time for what brings you joy.

  • Get moving. Exercise has been shown to boost mood, and of course, it’s good for your body too.
  • Spend time with people you love, who know your worth and treat you accordingly.
  • Paint, read, sing, cook, plant a garden — spend time enjoying rather than criticizing yourself.
  • Displace negativity by practicing gratitude for what’s positive in your life.

What’s Next?

Adopting a positive mindset, taking good care of yourself, and cultivating joy can help you defeat your secret insecurities and recognize your inherent worth. But if you also want to change your physical appearance to help feel more confident, there’s nothing wrong with that.

Just make sure you’ve considered why you want the change and that you’re in the right headspace. It’s a big decision, and Dr. Lucas cares about your physical and mental health, which is why he checks in on both during every consultation.

No matter what, don’t let insecurities hold you back. At The Lucas Center, we’re all about creating real, lasting confidence. We can’t wait to help your confidence grow!

(865) 217-0572